Black and Gold Crayons

It occurred to me recently as I posted on Facebook the other day that our life together is becoming a memory.

Every day that slips by takes me one day further from my Love. But as was pointed out to me, although we cannot add to those memories, they can’t ever be taken away either.

And it’s weird to realize how I still define myself. I’ve noticed that I find it necessary to say that I have a dead husband, as he’s only dead for a limited time.  You don’t have to get it, I hope you never have to. Interestingly enough, I’ve started to feel more comfortable wearing my wedding and engagement ring than not.  For the last few months I just couldn’t, but for the moment it just feels right.

Paradoxically, I am also reminded that I am very blessed and there are many moments cherish to come in my life.  I don’t see that as very possible sometimes, then at others, especially right after God has given me a besito it’s so easy to believe.  Like the other night a great experience that couldn’t have been planned better  and it was as if Jeff were there, followed by a great dinner with friends who are family and on the table waiting for us, Black and Gold crayons…

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